trahn

For the first time ever I’m actually feeling a bit down due to reasons beyond my own control or the involvement of other people. I’ve written about girls before on this blog and I’m pretty relaxed about being single and I do believe everything will plan put alright in the end. I’ve made major progress in the way I approach girls since I wrote my “How to pick up girls…” entry even thou I’ve made no progress in actually finding anyone. I’m a lot more relaxed and don’t really give a fuck to be blunt about it. Still my same old self but due to events in the last couple of days my morale has dropped significantly. I met a really nice girl, showed some interest by talking to her. She showed some interest and gave me her number without me even asking for it. Some messages were sent and from nowhere she invites me to come and visit her.  I do have a tendency to read to much into situations and maybe this is just someone being friendly and wanting to make new friends. Maybe it’s all cultural differences and that’s the way they do it in other countries but certain behaviour makes me believe things that I maybe shouldn’t.
However the problem has not appeared so far, it arose last night due to some critical information from a mutual friend. She has a boyfriend. Brilliant. Guess its back to square one then and hands off from now on. Not that anything has happened but still. Just frustrating when I kind of get my hopes up and everything crumbles around me. It’s not really a big deal, it’s happened before but sometimes I’m just a lot more sensitive about things like this. It comes and goes and most of the time I’m cool with it. Maybe it’s because of coming back to a house full of couples and being the odd one out. Seeing people cuddle and spending time together with someone they like around me all hours of the day. I don’t mind being single, it does cause you a hell of a lot less grief than having a partner. Less responsibility and you don’t have to take other people in consideration for all your actions, not that I would ever do anything inappropriate.
Celibacy doesn’t seem as bad as it used to or maybe girls are to blame for my misery.
Are girls actually the source of all evil or maybe even antichrist himself/herself? Are we being played like marionettes to follow their every wink without us knowing about it? Being to busy thinking about how to please girls that we don’t notice their mind games.
I know that’s not it and even it was true I wouldn’t want to believe it. It’s just my own mind playing tricks with me. Give it a couple of days and it will all be forgotten. Like I mentioned before, back to square one…..once again….but I’m not bitter…or am I?